


"Truth and ConseQuences"

by fmlyhntr, jamelia116, Rocky_T, Voyager_Virtual Season_7-5_Staff_Writers (jamelia116)



Series: Voyager Virtual Season 7.5 [34]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Kazon (Star Trek), Q Continuum, The Borg, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-12-13 21:34:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21004514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fmlyhntr/pseuds/fmlyhntr, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamelia116/pseuds/jamelia116, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rocky_T/pseuds/Rocky_T, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamelia116/pseuds/Voyager_Virtual%20Season_7-5_Staff_Writers
Summary: Q takes Janeway on an incredible journey.(Takes place in August, 2380, while Chakotay is away on the Sherman's Planet dig, as shown in "Reconstruction Blues.")





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Yup. We don't own them, we just wish we did. The rights to Star Trek in all of its versions belong to Paramount/Viacom/CBS. We like to borrow the characters every now and then. No Star Trek characters were really harmed by this story.

**Truth and ConseQuences**

****  
By Christina and Rocky  
  


****  
Warning: This story contains violence and other drastic events that some readers may find disturbing.  


**Previously on VVS7.5:**

_"When you finish your leave, I'm going to assign you to the Academy for at least six months. You'll teach some first contact courses and get yourself caught up. At the end of that time, I'll make a decision. In the meantime, I want you to give serious thought as to what you want and whether you can adjust to the hierarchy -- and yes, the bureaucracy -- again. Starfleet needs good field commanders, Captain, but not mavericks."--Admiral Jack Hayes to Captain Janeway ("In The Course Of Justice")_

****  
Prologue  
  
Kathryn Janeway gazed at the painting and decided not to say what she really thought. Especially since her sister clearly found it fascinating.  
  
"Look," Phoebe said as she tugged painfully on Kathryn's arm. "It's by Geoffrey Wallace!"  
  
"Ah." Kathryn had no idea who Wallace was, but figured her sister's excitement could only mean he was an artist of some renown.  
  
"Don't give me that blank look, Kathryn," Phoebe said with a hint of impatience in her voice. "Geoffrey Wallace--in addition to being one of the other guest speakers here this evening--was commissioned to paint a series of interpretive works for the Society's main building on Mars."  
  
"Of course," Kathryn said, praying she sounded convincing enough. "How could I have forgotten?"  
  
Phoebe shot her a look worthy of a Starfleet captain, but refrained from saying anything further on the topic. "Thank you for inviting me this evening, Kathryn. Even if your primary motivation was to avoid going solo, since Chakotay is still off-planet. And even if I had to sit through a boring lecture on astronomical phenomena of the Delta Quadrant." She gave her older sister a wicked smile that suddenly changed to one of delight. "Oh, that's Wallace over there now! I'll be right back!"  
  
Phoebe dashed away, before Kathryn could remind her that _she_ had been the keynote speaker and it had not been “boring”, but a very well received presentation.  
  
"Captain Janeway!" a somewhat overweight woman called out as she approached. Kathryn stifled a groan when she realized who it was--Mrs. Florence Vanderhosen, the wife of the Vice-Chairman of the Federation Geographical and Astronomical Society. "I see you are admiring our Wallace. He's done a _wonderful_ job capturing the _drama_ of a supernova..."  
  
Kathryn smiled politely. "Yes, he has," she said diplomatically and glanced again at the painting. The bizarre combination of purple and green didn't come close to capturing anything about a supernova. She had first-hand experience in that department, recalling all too well the day the war in the Q Continuum had caused a series of supernovae to erupt.  
  
But there was no point trying to correct Mrs. Vanderhosen, who prattled on, "Like I always say, Kathryn--you don't mind if I call you Kathryn, do you dear?--There are so few artists who can truly portray the _essence_ of a thing while staying true to its _nature_\--"  
  
Kathryn bore the lecture stoically, nodding and murmuring at appropriate intervals. Fortunately, the worthy matron was soon distracted by the sight of several more people approaching, including Captain Rodrigo, the Astronomy department chair at the Academy. "Excuse me, Kathryn, I must have a word with dear Captain Rodrigo." She hurried off in a swirl of chiffon and heavy perfume.  
  
Kathryn drained the last drops in her glass and decided to go for a refill. She certainly needed some sustenance to make it through the rest of the evening. If only Chakotay had been able to be with her tonight. _He_ wouldn't have abandoned her to hobnob with some handsome artist, as her sister had done. Unfortunately, a last-minute glitch at the dig site on Sherman's Planet had delayed his arrival by another week. She looked around the room quickly. Phoebe was nowhere to be seen.  
  
Kathryn snagged a glass of champagne off the tray of a passing waiter just as Captain Rodrigo approached her. "Whew!" he muttered. "That woman could talk the legs off an Andorian tika-beast."  
  
"I take it you didn't find Mrs. Vanderhosen's views of celestial phenomena very enlightening?" Kathryn asked, her eyes dancing with amusement.  
  
Rodrigo snorted. "Now your presentation, Captain, that was something." He leaned forward. "Your discoveries in the Delta Quadrant are going to revolutionize astrophysics, in fact, have already begun to do so. We're very fortunate to have you teaching at the Academy this past semester."  
  
"Thank you," Kathryn said. "I'm enjoying the experience."  
  
"Quite a change of pace from commanding a starship, of course," Rodrigo said. "Any chance of making your appointment permanent?"  
  
"That's up to Admiral Hayes," Kathryn replied neutrally.  
  
"I daresay you're eager to return to space," Rodrigo said sagely. "In the meantime, a group of us were discussing the new core curriculum for incoming cadets. Perhaps you would care to join us?"  
  
Kathryn bit back a groan. If there was one thing about her current assignment she really disliked, it was the games of departmental politics that seemed to dominate every gathering. "I really don't feel I'm qualified to offer an opinion," she said, hoping she sounded sufficiently diplomatic. "After all, I haven't been a member of the faculty very long."  
  
"Everyone's entitled to have an opinion!" exclaimed Captain Neustadt of the Physics department. Kathryn hadn't noticed him standing next to Rodrigo. "Even if they're wrong."  
  
Kathryn chuckled along with the other people standing nearby, then resigned herself to participating in the discussion. After a decent interval, she managed to excuse herself.  
  
She'd been quite flattered when the invitation to be the keynote speaker at the Federation Geographic and Astronomical Society Conference had first arrived, and she'd enjoyed putting together and presenting a lecture detailing her work from the Delta Quadrant. But the social part of the evening had turned out to be a real disappointment, to put it mildly. "Deadly bore" didn't even begin to describe it.  
  
There was a crash behind her followed by some angry voices. Apparently someone had plowed into one of the waiters, upsetting several trays. She decided to ignore the situation and find Phoebe. She'd been standing there with a smile plastered on her face for hours, or so it seemed--surely it was time to go home.  
  
"Captain Janeway," said a voice behind her.  
  
Janeway turned quickly. She tried and failed to place the petite woman who stood before her. "I'm sorry, have we met before?"  
  
The woman laughed, a bit too loudly. "No, we haven't. But you knew my sister all right--she served on _Voyager_." The last words were slurred.  
  
"Michelle, don't," a tall thin man said as he hurried over. "You're drunk." He reached for Michelle's arm, but the woman slapped it away.  
  
"Don't worry, Danny, I just want to have a few words with the Captain here," Michelle insisted. "The hero of the Delta Quadrant, she can take a few minutes to talk to me about my sister."  
  
"Your sister?" Kathryn asked, confused.  
  
"Lily Ford."  
  
Kathryn stared at the woman. Ford...she racked her brain to match the name to a face. Then she remembered. Ensign Lily Ford had been one of the earliest casualties, dying only a few months after _Voyager_ had first been pulled into the Delta Quadrant.  
  
Michelle grabbed Kathryn's shoulder. "Don't want anyone to know how you murdered my sister, do you?" she shouted. People were starting to turn around and stare.  
  
"Your sister worked in xenobiology. I didn't get a chance to know her very well," Kathryn said quietly, as she extricated herself from the other woman's grasp. "She died in a battle with the Kazon."  
  
"If you hadn't stranded her in that God-forsaken quadrant, she wouldn't have been anywhere near the Kazon," Michelle hissed. "You had no business destroying the only way home. My sister should have been back home, with her family. That's where she belonged. But you killed her, you bitch! It's your fault she's dead!" She lunged at Kathryn.  
  
Danny grabbed Michelle's arms. "Michelle, come on, you're making a scene." Two hotel security personnel arrived to assist. Together they wrestled the woman away, but her screams could still be heard.  
  
"Damn right I am! Starfleet's golden girl--but she killed my sister and I won't let her--or any of you--forget it!"  
  
Kathryn stood frozen in place. She didn't react when someone tapped her gently on the arm.  
  
"Kathryn, what was that about?" Phoebe asked. Her face was full of concern.  
  
"Nothing." The last thing Kathryn wanted to do was talk about it; she just wanted to get away. "Let's go."  
  
Phoebe sighed. "Fine. I won't force you to talk about that crazy woman if you don't want to. But Kath, even before this, you've been moody all evening." Kathryn's lips opened and she was about to deny it when Phoebe added, "And don't tell me it's because you haven't seen Chakotay for two months."  
  
"Phoebe, that has nothing to do with--" Kathryn began.  
  
Phoebe grinned, apparently pleased she'd managed to distract her sister, albeit briefly, "All right, I'll be ready to go in a few minutes. But first I want to say good-bye to Geoff."  
  
Kathryn stared for a moment, before she realized Phoebe was talking about the painter, Wallace. "So, it's Geoff now?"  
  
"Don't get any ideas," Phoebe admonished her. "I'm hoping he'll come to the university next year as a guest artist. I've been trying for months to meet with him. Why else do you think I came to this shindig?"  
  
"Obviously not to hear me speak," Kathryn said but Phoebe was already gone. Kathryn shook her head and started moving toward the door. It was getting too hot and stuffy in the room. She'd wait for Phoebe outside.  
  
She stood outside the exit for several seconds, undecided as to where to go, before turning and heading toward the gardens at the back of the hotel. Michelle Ford's words echoed in her mind. No matter what Kathryn told herself, she had to admit that those accusations--despite being uttered in a drunken rage-- weren't entirely unfounded. So many people had died over the years, so many lives lost. Lives that _she_ had been responsible for. Kathryn had met Lily Ford exactly once, before _Voyager _had left Deep Space Nine. The ensign had been one of the first deaths in the Delta Quadrant; unfortunately, there had been many more after her.  
  
Kathryn leaned against a tall pillar and took several deep breaths. Phoebe's comment about her moodiness was surprising--particularly as Kathryn had thought she'd been doing a good job of concealing the sense of uneasiness that had been plaguing her lately. Her dreams during the past week had been full of 'might-have-beens'--what would have happened if only she had done things differently.  
  
She looked up at the stars. "Why?" she asked the Universe. "Why did _Voyager_ have to be stranded out there in the Delta Quadrant? Why did so many have to die?"  
  
"Now that is a very interesting question," a male voice said next to her, making her jump.  
  
"Q?" she said, more than a little shocked. She hadn't seen him for years. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"It has been a while, hasn't it?" he said. He was wearing the gray Starfleet uniform of a captain, she noticed, wondering suddenly why he never wore an admiral's uniform. As if reading her thoughts, he said, "Because captains have more fun than admirals--but I thought you knew that. As to your other question, I'm here because I can be." He winked. "If you want to give up the boyfriend, I could arrange a whirlwind tour of the galaxy. Think of it, my dear sweet Kathy, just you, me and the endless cosmos!"  
  
"No thank you, Q," Kathryn said immediately. "Even if I was interested in giving up Chakotay--which I'm not--you're married, or have you forgotten?"  
  
"Ah yes, the wife." Q didn't look too happy to have the topic brought up. "She's doing well. So is our boy. He's unusually fond of puppies for some reason, though."  
  
"That's good." Kathryn kept her voice even, hoping he would catch the hint and leave. Wishful thinking, she realized, as Q didn't seem eager to depart.  
  
"And I'm rather fond of you, Kathy darling," Q continued as if she hadn't spoken. "You saved the Continuum, helped me produce a child--even if you weren't as directly involved as I'd planned--so I owe you something in return." His grin grew--she immediately thought of the Cheshire Cat from "Alice In Wonderland", but then started worrying why he was here. "At the very least I can do something about the deep unhappiness you're feeling at the moment."  
  
"Who said I'm unhappy?" she parried.  
  
"Stubborn as always, aren't you, my dear?" Q shook his head. "You're feeling melancholy, and you are bored to tears--such a quaint saying--but you are bored. I could hear your boredom all the way into the Continuum. And do I need to add that you are also feeling guilty? Such a useless emotion, but you are. I can change that."  
  
"Thanks for the generous offer, but no thanks. I'll pass."  
  
Q clucked his tongue disapprovingly. "But you haven't heard what it is!"  
  
Janeway had a bad feeling about this--a feeling which grew worse with each passing second. "Q," she said with a sigh, "I am not going to mate with you, travel with you...or anything else with you. Please go away."  
  
He bowed. "Very well, Kathy, if that's what you _really_ want, I'll go. However, I just can't leave you feeling this way. There must be _something_ I can do..." All at once he stopped. "Of course!"  
  
Before she could say or do anything, he snapped his fingers.  
  
  



	2. Act 1

  
**Act One  
  
**Kathryn felt herself caught up in a swirling white mist. She had the sensation of stars beneath her feet, of comets flashing by. For a split second she was standing in the blinding light of a sun, feeling its energy coursing through her limbs. Then all too soon the light gave way to gathering darkness, and she became aware she was standing on a solid surface.  
  
"Q, where are you? Where am I?" she called out, but was not surprised by the lack of a response. Some things never changed. "Annoying as ever," she muttered to herself.  
  
Kathryn took a deep breath and turned to study her new surroundings. The light was very dim, but the gray corridor was familiar, she realized with a start. As incredible as it seemed, she appeared to be standing inside the Caretaker's Array.  
  
"Q, why have you brought me here?" she demanded. She turned sharply at the sound of voices.  
  
_"Captain, I can access the system to send us back to Federation space," the Vulcan officer said, as he approached through the darkness, his tricorder in his hand. "But it will take several hours to activate."  
  
Off to the side an old man sat on a bale of hay, plucking aimlessly at his banjo. "You're nothing if not persistent," he said with a melancholy smile.  
  
Captain Janeway knelt to face the old man. "We're stuck here...unless you're willing to help us?"  
  
He looked away. "I wish I could. I have very little time left." The Captain had to strain to hear his words. "I've begun to transmit the contents of my data banks to the Ocampa. I've also initiated a self-destruct program."  
  
"If you destroy the array we'll have no way to get home!" Janeway protested in alarm  
  
"The Ocampa's enemies cannot be allowed to control this installation," the Caretaker whispered hoarsely. "In minutes it will be destroyed. You have to go now."  
  
The Captain rose to her feet. "Lieutenant, prepare to activate the system. We'll have to--" She fell to the ground as the array shook violently. The holographic surroundings flickered several times, then vanished.  
  
Tuvok glanced at his tricorder. "Fascinating."  
  
Where the holographic projection of an old man had been only moments before, a massive, glowing, crystalline-like blob vibrated before them.  
  
"The Caretaker in his true form?" Tuvok asked.  
  
"Voyager, report!" Janeway called out.  
  
Rollins' voice responded. "A Kazon vessel just collided with the Array. Captain, are you all right?"  
  
"Affirmative." Janeway took Tuvok's outstretched hand and pulled herself to her feet. "Stand by."  
  
The Caretaker spoke once more. "The termination program...has been damaged. Now this installation will not be destroyed. But it must be. The Kazon must not be allowed to gain control of it. They will annihilate the Ocampa." With an almost Human-sounding sigh, the Caretaker dwindled in size, the light fading until only a misshapen lump of an alien-looking ore was left.  
  
The captain cast a look at regret at the remains of the once-powerful entity and then briskly tapped her combadge. "Janeway to Voyager. What's our status?"  
  
"Captain, the Kazon have moved off for now," Rollins said. "We intercepted a call from Jabin for more reinforcements. Our shields are at 75 percent. They should be back to full power in a few minutes."  
  
"Good," Janeway said. "What about our prisoners?"  
  
"As per your orders, Captain, the Maquis were beamed directly to the Brig. Their leader, Chakotay, is demanding to speak with you."  
  
"That will have to wait," Janeway said. She turned to Tuvok. "Go ahead, Lieutenant. Begin accessing the return system."  
  
"Yes, Captain. However, it would go faster if I had some assistance," Tuvok said.  
  
Janeway nodded. "Time is still of the essence, even though it looks like we've gotten a bit of a reprieve from the Kazon. Voyager, I want you to send an engineering team to my coordinates."  
  
Within moments a transporter beam lit up the chamber, and five engineers, headed by Lieutenant Carey, appeared. Tuvok immediately briefed them on what needed to be done.  
  
Not much time had elapsed before the job was complete. "The system is primed and ready," Tuvok reported. "We can activate it remotely once we are back on board Voyager."  
  
"Janeway to Voyager. Seven to beam up," the captain ordered. As soon as they had materialized on the transporter pad, Janeway strode forward. "Have our two Delta Quadrant guests left yet?"  
  
"Yes, ma'am," Ensign Mulcahey reported. "Neelix's scout ship launched fifteen minutes ago."  
  
"Time for us to be on our way as well," Janeway said, as she hurried to the Bridge.  
  
"Report," she snapped as soon as the turbolift doors parted.  
  
"Course laid in, Captain," Lora Jenkins said from the helm. Tom Paris hovered silently nearby, his face grim as he gazed longingly at the console.  
  
"Seven Kazon ships have appeared on long-range scanners," Ensign Kim said, looking none the worse for his ordeal in the Ocampan caverns.  
  
"These must be Jabin's reinforcements," the captain noted. "Estimated time of arrival?"  
  
"They should be here in an hour," Kim said.  
  
Janeway glanced at Tuvok. "Prepare to activate the array."  
  
_"Q!" Kathryn shouted. "That's not how it happened!"  
  
An amused chuckle sounded in her ear. "Come, come, Kathy, weren't you just asking why _Voyager_ had to be in the Delta Quadrant for so many years? Haven't you ever wondered what would have happened if you had used the Caretaker's Array instead of destroying it?" Q rubbed his hands together in glee. "Now's your chance to find out!"  
  
"But the Ocampa--the Kazon--" Kathryn began.  
  
"Tut tut!" Q admonished her and placed a finger across her lips. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves, _ma petite capitaine_! First things first!"  
  
The swirling white mist enveloped her again.  
  
_Captain Janeway nodded briefly to the security officers manning the brig and walked the length of the row of detention cells, ignoring the angry stares from the nearly three dozen Maquis prisoners. She stopped at the furthest unit and silently studied the Maquis leader. Chakotay glared at her, then looked away.  
  
"What do you want?" B'Elanna Torres demanded. Her belligerence made Janeway very glad there was a security force shield separating them. "Did you come here to gloat? We sacrificed our ship for you--and all we did was make it easier for you to capture us."  
  
"Commander Chakotay," Janeway said in a voice designed to get attention. He looked up, but his gaze held no defiance. He looked exactly like what he was--a beaten and defeated man.  
  
"Commander, I wish to thank you. Without your sacrifice, we wouldn't have made it home."  
  
"Some thanks," Torres snarled. "You threw us in jail. If you really mean it, let us go."  
  
"I can’t do that," Janeway responded evenly. "My orders were to apprehend you and turn you over to the Federation authorities. But I can speak to the courts about leniency, in light of your valiant actions--"  
  
"Leniency? You petaQ!" Torres yelled as she threw herself against the force field. A young Bajoran woman caught her as her body absorbed the energy charge and fell back.  
  
"Calm down, B'Elanna," the woman murmured lowering her gently to the bunk. "Getting angry isn't going to do any good."  
  
Though obviously in pain, Torres struggled to get up once more. "Get your hands off me, Seska. I can't believe you're siding with her. Starfleet is in league with those murdering Cardassian bastards!"  
  
Seska's lips tightened. "You're not telling me anything I don't know. But I also know there's no point in wasting our energy now."  
  
Janeway nodded. "A wise course of action." She directed her words to Chakotay once more. "Thanks to your actions, we were able to use the Caretaker's Array to return to the Alpha Quadrant. We're just outside of the Badlands now and will be docking at Deep Space Nine within 12 hours."  
  
Chakotay spoke for the first time. "At least we're not stranded 70,000 light years away from home."  
  
"Exactly."  
  
Torres managed to gain her feet once more. "What gives her the right to decide our fates?" she said angrily. "She didn't even ask if we wanted to return to Federation space."  
  
"She's the Captain," Chakotay said quietly. "It's her decision."  
  
"And we're the ones who will live with that choice," Torres said.  
  
Janeway turned to go, but paused for a moment. "Look at it this way, Ms. Torres. After you serve your time, you'll have the opportunity to make a whole new life for yourself. All of you will. That's not something that would have happened had our ships remained in the Delta Quadrant." The last thing she heard before she left the detention area was a string of Klingon curses.  
  
_Q smiled. "Is that better?"  
  
Kathryn shook her head angrily. "No! Look, Q, I don't know what kind of game you're playing here--"  
  
"Consider me the Ghost of _Voyager_ Past," he said at once and struck a pose, a long brown cloak thrown over his shoulder. At her glare, he snapped his fingers and his 19th century attire disappeared; he was once more clad in a Starfleet uniform. "Oh, but my darling Kathy, we've just begun the journey into the alternate universe. You wouldn't want to be rude, would you?"  
  
"Yes, I would."  
  
"As blunt and to the point as ever." He leaned in closer; for a brief second Kathryn thought he might kiss her. Instead he whispered, "For every action there is an opposite reaction."  
  
"What does Newton have to do with--"  
  
She didn't finish her sentence. Once again she was yanked through time and space.  
  
****  



	3. Act 2

****Act Two  
  
"Ever wonder what might have happened to Neelix and his pixie girlfriend once _Voyager_ went on its merry way?" Q asked her.  
  
Kathryn glared at him. "Where are we?" she demanded.  
  
"They fell into the hands of the Kazon, of course," Q said, ignoring her question. "And without Voyager to protect them from Jabin's vengeance...well, why don't you just see for yourself."  
  
_"Maje Jabin," the Kazon soldier said. "We have the prisoners."_  
  
"Excellent," Jabin answered. A cruel smile played along his lips as Kes and Neelix were brought in to the encampment, their hands bound behind their backs. One of the guards forced them roughly to their knees; the other five took up positions behind them.  
  
Neelix coughed and sputtered, trying to spit the dirt out of his mouth. "Jabin, my friend--"  
  
"Silence!" roared Jabin. He viciously backhanded the Talaxian across the face. "You've been more trouble to us than you're worth, even counting the paltry trade you brought us." He pulled out a short, wicked-looking knife and plunged it into Neelix's chest.  
  
"No!" Kes shouted as Neelix collapsed in a heap on the sand. A thin stream of blood seeped out from the material of Neelix's jacket and was immediately absorbed by the dry ground.  
  
"Neelix, Neelix!" Kes sobbed. She threw herself over his body, only to be hauled up by the guards. "Why did you have to kill him?"  
  
"I don't need to explain anything to you." Jabin smiled. "Though in a way we share a bond, you and I. Your benefactor, or as you call him, the Caretaker, is now mine as well--thanks to the wonders he left behind in his Array." His smile grew more evil. "My men are uncovering a treasure trove of technology even as we speak. We'll be visiting the rest of your people soon enough." He gripped her chin firmly and raised her head till she was looking at him. Kes cringed but made no sound of protest.  
  
Jabin ran his eye appreciatively over her delicate features, their beauty unchanged despite the ugly bruises that scored her fair skin. "So lovely, and yet, so useless. Your people only live nine years...Not much good to anyone except as slaves. Or perhaps the Vidiians would be interested." He paused, considering. "No, your people will increase our profits by working for us. You will explain to them how easily you're getting off, all things considered. And you will ensure their cooperation."  
  
"I won't be a collaborator," Kes said, and jerked away from his grasp. "I'd rather take my chances with the Vidiians."  
  
Jabin laughed. "Of course, you've never met the Vidiians, so I must excuse your ignorance. To them you'd be considered nothing more than a collection of spare parts. I, on the hand, am offering your people life. The Vidiians only offer death."  
  
"Life as a slave is a living death," Kes said defiantly. "I will **not** help you subjugate my people!"  
  
He waved his hand in dismissal. "Perhaps you'll think otherwise soon enough. There are worse fates, my little desert bloom." Jabin nodded to the guards. "Contact Maje Cullah of the Kazon-Nistrim and tell him that I have a little gift for him."  
  
"No!" Kathryn took a step forward, and then stopped as she realized they couldn't see or hear her. She shuddered, still horrified at the scene that she had just witnessed. Neelix murdered, and Kes...Kathryn swallowed. She had often wondered if she had done those two any favors by allowing them to stay on _Voyager_, exposing them to the hardships and dangers of the journey, leaving behind everyone and everything that was familiar. But she had never, not even in her worst nightmares, imagined an even more terrible fate for them if they'd remained in the Delta Quadrant.  
  
"Please, Q. I understand now. _Voyager _had a major effect on this sector of the Delta Quadrant--and on its inhabitants. Is this why you wouldn't send us home?"  
  
Q shook his head as he gazed around the harsh landscape of the Ocampa surface. "Kathy, Kathy, Kathy. This is just a minor detail in the annals of the Delta Quadrant." He pointed to their left. A large contingent of Kazon soldiers were dragging a huge conical metal device toward the hills.  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"That, my dear Kathy, came from the Array. The Array which in this reality, you did _not_ destroy. Yes, Jabin's men will be tunneling down below the surface shortly. It will not take them long to discover the Ocampan sanctuary. All those dear, sweet little creatures, so innocent, so defenseless." Q turned abruptly, as if bored with the matter. "But as I said, this is just a very small--so small as to be insignificant--reason why the Continuum could not send you home. You do not yet understand your importance in the universe." He winked. "Come, we've got places to go and people to see."  
  
Kathryn put her hands on her hips and glared at him. "Answer me this: when you first appeared on my ship, early in our journey, you expressed surprise at seeing us. You said it would be another eighty years before Humans reached this quadrant in the normal course of events. And now you're saying that Voyager was _meant_ to be there all along? That doesn't make any sense."  
  
"Oh, you're a sharp one, Kathy! Just one of the reasons I'm so fond of you."  
  
"The truth, Q!"  
  
He hesitated, then nodded. "Very well. If I had told you the truth at that time and place, it could have had a drastic effect on the future. Not just yours, but of all sentient lifeforms. I'm sure you're familiar with the expression, 'a little knowledge is a dangerous thing'? Humans," he sighed. "Always so convinced of their own understanding, when they can barely see beyond the tip of their own noses!"  
  
She waited.  
  
"The Continuum decided it was in the galaxy's best interest--to avoid dire consequences--by fudging the truth a little," Q said.  
  
"Dire consequences?" Kathryn said. What could Q possibly mean? She thought back to the various foes they had encountered over the years. Some, like the Borg, had had the potential of threatening the Alpha Quadrant as well as--"Does this have anything to do with Species 8472?"  
  
Q smiled broadly. "Ah yes, the tripedal creatures from Fluidic Space, the ones with the name even the Continuum can't pronounce. The aliens you encountered in the midst of their life and death struggle with another terrible enemy for control of the Delta Quadrant, and by extension the entire galaxy."  
  
"A life and death struggle?" Suddenly Kathryn blanched. "You don't mean that in this reality they defeated the Borg--"  
  
"Kathy dear, you may go to the head of the class!" Q snapped his fingers.  
  
She shivered in the sudden darkness. "Q?"  
  
"Over here. Pull up an asteroid and join me." He motioned for her to come over. She looked around and gasped. Q was sitting on an asteroid, and she was floating in space against a backdrop of stars. "The show is about to begin." He waved his hand and she found herself sitting next to him on his asteroid. "That's better. We're in for a double feature today." He gestured to her right. "Recognize that planet?"  
  
She shook her head. "Q, if I've been here before, I certainly didn't view it from this vantage point." She frowned. "Q, why am I not dying of asphyxiation? I can’t breathe in a vacuum."  
  
He chuckled. "I'm your host. That should be enough explanation. And as to where, Tom Paris once crashed _Voyager _right over--" he pointed out a continent on the planet below "--there."  
  
"New Hope?" She smiled slightly at the memory of the months _Voyager _spent there. "It wasn't exactly a crash, more like a rough landing when we were thrown out of transwarp."  
  
Suddenly, the planet exploded, sending debris every which way.  
  
Janeway instinctively ducked. "What happened?"  
  
An elongated, needle-like ship hovered near the now empty space, causing her to shiver. She recognized it as one of the bioships of Species 8472. Something about it reminded her of a cat waiting for its prey.  
  
"Interesting choice of thought," Q said approvingly. "Ah, the second feature is about to begin."  
  
A Hirogen ship appeared at the edge of the system. Moments later it was joined by a second one. "And the opposition has arrived as well. But will they be playing the part of hunters--or prey?" Q reached back and pulled a bag of popcorn out of the darkness. "Want some?"  
  
She shook her head, her feeling of trepidation growing. "Q, I know full well the Hirogen are no match for 8472."  
  
No sooner were the words out of her mouth than the two Hirogen ships vanished without warning.  
  
Kathryn blinked, then rubbed her eyes. "What happened?"  
  
"You blinked." Q stood. "What you saw of those fluidic space creatures' abilities all those years ago was minor, compared to what they are truly capable of."  
  
The 8472 ship floated their way, hovered a second, then disappeared into a spatial anomaly that formed near where New Hope had once been.  
  
Q stood and applauded. "Bravo!" He held out his hand to her. "Excellent performance, wouldn't you say?"  
  
Kathryn stared at him in distaste. "Just tell me something, Q."  
  
"Anything, my sweet," he said with a grand flourish. "You want to know why 8472 did this? Why they seem set on--how did they once put it?--purging your galaxy?"  
  
She waved his words away impatiently. "No, why are you doing this to me? Forcing me to witness these events?"  
  
"Darling Kathy." Q suddenly grew serious. "Years ago I performed a similar service for one Jean-Luc Picard. Perhaps you've heard of him?"  
  
"Of course I have. And the only 'service' I know of that you did for him is that you introduced him to the Borg. At least that gave the Federation a warning--" She stopped abruptly as she recalled a discussion with a member of species 8472--one who looked just like Boothby--inside the simulation of Starfleet Headquarters. "This is also a warning, isn't it? Their intentions toward us are still hostile?"  
  
"Actually..." Q hesitated. "In your time and place, Species 8472 are no longer planning to purge minor lifeforms like yourself." He smiled, but it wasn't a pleasant expression. "They are still dangerous, however. You'd do well not to underestimate them. Remember Leather Boy?"  
  
"Who?"  
  
Q chuckled. "The mass murdering xenophobe, you know, that Devoran inspector. His people took on 8472, not because they were a threat to the entire galaxy, but merely because they were telepathic. And you know how the Devoran Empire felt about telepaths." He shook his head. "Kashyk was _so_ typical of his people."  
  
"Kashyk was a bastard," she said tersely, remembering how she'd matched wits with him--and won, enabling the Benari to escape through the wormhole.  
  
Without warning, the closing notes of Mahler's First Symphony blared harshly in the darkness, followed by a sudden silence.  
  
_A man waited in a darkened office. Within a few moments, there was a signal at the door. "Excellent," he said as he released the control. "Bring the prisoner in here. And have a communication channel standing by. As soon as we have the information I need, we'll be sending the fleet after the rest of the telepaths. "_  
  
A second later two Devoran guards entered, dragging a young Benari boy behind them. "Inspector Kashyk."  
  
Kashyk nodded curtly, then focused all his attention on the boy. The youngster couldn't have been much older than his mid-teens. Kashyk rested his hand on the boy's shoulder in an almost kindly gesture. "Let's not make this any harder than it has to be. Tell me, where did the others go?"  
  
"I don't know," the boy gasped out.  
  
Kashyk sighed as if in genuine regret. "I see. You know you're going to die, my lad. I see you’ve resigned yourself to your fate--or think you have. But why should your death be any more painful than it has to be? Tell me what I want to know, and I promise it will go easier for you."  
  
The boy didn't respond. His clothes were torn, his hair filthy and matted. Blood dripped from the corner of his mouth. Kashyk reached down and wiped the blood off the boy's face with a dirty rag. "Let's see if Sergeant Kraylk can get any further information." A woman walked forward and grabbed a handful of hair as she yanked the boy's head up.  
  
"This one won't last much longer, sir," she said.  
  
Kashyk nodded curtly. "All right, then kill him now. His sister will tell us what we need to know." He tapped the butt end of his whip against the palm of his hand. "No doubt she will be more amenable to persuasion." He smiled as he said the last word, making it sound almost like an obscenity.  
  
"No!" the boy yelled. "No, just leave her alone! I'll tell you, I'll tell you everything you want." Kashyk bent his head down to listen. No sooner had the boy finished his confession than Kashyk calmly lifted his weapon and shot the boy in the head.  
  
"Kill his sister and the rest of prisoners. And have the fleet meet us at sector 524." Kashyk stretched luxuriously. "This has been a good night's work. There will be no escape for the telepaths." All but one of the soldiers left the room.  
  
Kashyk glanced at the body by his feet. "Prax! Have someone come in to dispose of the trash."  
  
"One could almost feel sorry for Kashyk, knowing how Species 8472 totally destroyed his people shortly afterward. The Devore Imperium was no match for the bioships or their weapons." Q sighed. "Almost. Scenes like this one remind you that sometimes villains do get their just deserts." He glanced at her curiously. "I never knew what you saw in him, Kathy. Granted he had a certain base appeal, but really, he's not your type. You always did tend to go more for the spiritual philosopher kind. Like Chuckles, or even your beloved dog-sitter." Q suddenly smiled. "Which reminds me, I think it's about time we paid a visit to the Alpha Quadrant now, to see what you and the rest of your crew have made of your lives."  



	4. Act 3

  
**Act Three  
  
**_Captain Janeway sat at her desk in her Ready Room, considering. After a long moment, she tapped her comm badge. "I want a channel to Earth, San Francisco."  
  
"Yes, ma'am," replied Ensign McMinn at Ops. She was filling in for Lieutenant Kim, who had been severely injured in the most recent firefight with the Jem'Hadar. "Starfleet Command?"  
  
"No," answered the captain. "No, this one's a personal call."  
  
"Understood," McMinn said. Less than a minute later she reported, "Your husband is on the line, Captain."  
  
"Thank you." Janeway turned to her monitor and smiled at the image of the man who appeared. "Hello, darling."  
  
"Kath!" Mark said in surprise. "I wasn't expecting to hear from you until the end of the week, to confirm our travel plans."  
  
Janeway's smile faded at the mention of the family trip they'd been planning for ages. "That's what I'm calling about, actually. You see--"  
  
"No," he interrupted firmly. "Don't tell me you're canceling!"  
  
"I'm sorry, Mark, I really am, but I can't help it. Something very important has come up."  
  
"It's always something important, isn't it?" Mark's lips tightened in disapproval.  
  
Some of the apologetic note vanished from Janeway's voice. "Look, I know you're disappointed, but surely it hasn't escaped your attention that the Federation is at war. I can't simply tell HQ, 'sorry, you can't send my ship on a crucial mission because I promised my husband and daughter I'd go on vacation with them this month.' "  
  
"That's just it," Mark said, leaning forward so that his image filled the screen. "You promised. It's not so much me--though it would be nice to see you more often than once every six months--but what about Susie? You can't disappoint a child like that, Kathryn. It's just not right."  
  
"I'm sorry, Mark, but she'll just have to understand. I've got duties, responsibilities--"  
  
"And what about your responsibilities as a mother?"  
  
Janeway counted to ten silently. This wasn't the first time they'd had this argument, and it wouldn't be the last. Why did Mark persist in putting her on the spot like this? Couldn't he see how torn she was? Didn't he know how much she missed him and their child, didn't he understand what she was going through? From the obstinate look on his face, it didn't seem as though he understood anything at all.  
  
She broke the impasse finally. "How is Susie doing? How's the new school year going?"  
  
Mark's face softened. "She loves it, Kath, she really does. She has a much better teacher this year, one who understands how to channel the energy of our little 'dynamo' and keep her interested and busy."  
  
"That's good to hear. I'm really glad." Janeway paused for a moment. "Is she home now? I'd like to speak to her."  
  
"I'm sorry, but she's at a birthday party for one of the children in her class. They were going to go hoverskating and then have a barbecue afterwards."  
  
Janeway forced down her own disappointment. "Well, I'm sure she's having a wonderful time."  
  
"She'll be sorry to have missed your call," Mark said. His tone implied that wasn't all Susie would be missing.  
  
"So am I. Maybe I'll try again tomorrow, before her bedtime, if I can."  
  
"That sounds like a good idea." Mark hesitated. "Kath, I miss you."  
  
"Oh, Mark, I miss you too." She hastily blinked away the tears she could feel gathering in the corners of her eyes. "And I want you to know how much I love you."  
  
He smiled sadly. "That's what you always say, but it would be nice to have a little proof to back it up sometimes."  
  
Janeway winced but she managed to keep her voice steady as she said, "I'll talk to you tomorrow, darling."  
  
After the connection was broken, Janeway picked up the framed holograph on her desk. It showed a man, a little girl with russet-colored braids and a large Irish setter. The man and girl were both laughing into the camera. They both looked so happy. What wouldn't she give to be able to be with them now. She hadn't asked for this war with the Dominion, but like it or not she was stuck out here, fighting to keep her loved ones--and everyone else's loved ones--safe. She only hoped that when it was all over she'd be able to make up for lost time.  
  
The chirp of her comm badge intruded on her reverie.  
  
"Captain Janeway, we've sighted three Jem'Hadar vessels on long-range sensors," her first officer said.  
  
"On my way," the captain said. She put the picture down and strode out the door.  
  
_"Do I detect some trouble in paradise?" Q asked rhetorically. "My, my, it's just not so easy to 'have it all', is it? Even Mark, who waited patiently for you all those years you were busy building a career, clearly is getting tired of always playing second fiddle to Starfleet." He sighed dramatically. "So much for 'happily ever after.' I hope you and Chuckles have better luck."  
  
Kathryn shook her head slowly. That scene with Mark--it had felt so real. She couldn't deny that she had wondered more than once what would have happened if _Voyager_ had returned home right away, if Mark hadn't married someone else. Now she had her answer--that is, if she could take what Q showed her at face value.  
  
"So _Voyager_ would have ended up fighting in the Dominion War," she said instead. "Well, that's to be expected. Every able-bodied ship in the fleet was involved."  
  
"Trust you to try and focus on the big picture, Kathy," Q said fondly. "That's right--war. Ironic isn't it, that all those years on _Voyager_ you thought of the Alpha Quadrant as a haven of safety, and yet at that very moment, they were in as much danger as you were!" He leaned close and whispered, "And don't think they didn't suffer their share of casualties as well."  
  
Kathryn had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach that she was about to find out just what those losses were.  
  
_The room was bright and cozy, a cheerful counterpoint to the autumn storm raging outside. The woman glanced quickly at the rain lashing the windows and then at the two small boys engaged in a noisy game of kadis-kot on the floor before turning her attention back to the comm unit.  
  
"That's wonderful news, Maggie!" she said. "I can't tell you how thrilled I am to hear my little sister is finally getting married!"  
  
Maggie laughed. "Now Annie Carey, you make it sound like I've been an old maid forever. Just because I didn't run off and get married right out of school like you and Joe did--"  
  
"All right, all right," Annie said, just as the comm beeped, signifying another incoming call. She ignored the would-be interruption. "I guess thirty isn't so old. Have you picked a date yet?"  
  
"Not yet, but we were thinking sometime in early spring. How does that sound?"  
  
"Early spring?" Annie smiled and placed a hand on her belly. She shifted position slightly so her profile was facing the screen. "I'm afraid I might have a conflicting engagement around that time."  
  
Maggie's face was a study in confusion. "What could you possibly be doing--" Suddenly, her face cleared. "Oh my goodness! You're pregnant?"  
  
"Yes," Annie confirmed, her smile growing broader. "So if you want me to be your matron of honor you're going to have to reschedule your big day, because I don't think I can do it then!"  
  
"Another baby? You and Joe must be so thrilled."  
  
"We're very excited," Annie began, frowning when the comm beeped again.  
  
"I'll bet you are," Maggie said. "Uh, Annie, do you want to take that other call? That's the second time someone's tried to get through in the past few minutes."  
  
Annie shook her head. "If it's important, they'll call back again later when I'm not busy."  
  
"But if it's important--"  
  
"How often do I get to speak with you?" Annie said, in a tone that brooked no further argument. "Your call is important, too."  
  
Maggie conceded the point. "Do you know what sex the baby is?"  
  
"No, we decided we didn’t want to know, but truth be told, we **are** hoping for a girl this time." Annie glanced at the boys again and lowered her voice a bit. "Not that I'm complaining, understand, but as Joe said, it would be nice to have a daughter--they're supposed to be easier than sons."  
  
"I think our mother would have a slightly different opinion on the subject," Maggie retorted, her eyes dancing. "We certainly led her on a merry chase."  
  
"You mean **you** did," Annie said, with a mock frown.  
  
"Is Joe around? I'd like to give him my good wishes in person."  
  
"No, he was last home on leave a couple of months ago," Annie said. "Right now his ship is on patrol near the Cardassian border."  
  
"Well, the next time you speak to him, give him my love," Maggie said, just as the comm beeped a third time. She added hastily, "Look, Annie, I've got to run. We've got tickets to the symphony this evening and if I don't hurry I'm going to be late."  
  
"It was lovely talking to you, Maggie," Annie said.  
  
"Same here. Hug the boys for me, Annie. Bye."  
  
Annie smiled as the screen went dark and then entered the commands to allow the other call to come through. "Whoever you are, you're certainly persistent," she muttered, then drew in a sharp intake of breath as the official Starfleet seal appeared onscreen, quickly replaced by the image of a bearded officer.  
  
"Mrs. Anne Carey?" the man asked.  
  
"Yes," she said, feeling a sudden tingle of apprehension.  
  
"This is Commander Thanatos at Starfleet Headquarters," he said. "I regret to inform you that your husband, Lieutenant Commander Joseph Carey, was killed in action in the battle of the combined Federation, Klingon and Romulan fleets over Cardassia Prime. His ship, Voyager, took heavy damage and Commander Carey died during the successful ejection of the ship's warp core following the loss of the containment field."  
  
She stared at the screen in shock. "Joe--he's dead? But that can't be! I just got a letter from him yesterday."  
  
Commander Thanatos looked uncomfortable. "A full report will be forwarded to you as soon as it becomes available, ma'am. I'm sorry for your loss."  
  
Mechanically, Annie reached out and broke the connection. For a long moment she sat there, too stunned even for tears. And then, moving like an old woman, she went to break the news to her children.  
  
_"So tragic, isn't it?" Q said softly. "After his miraculous return from the Delta Quadrant, Joe Carey always felt like he was living on borrowed time. Yes, the poor fellow was somehow convinced that he was fated to die out there."  
  
"But he didn't," Kathryn said, overcome with grief by what she had just witnessed. She dabbed angrily at her eyes. "Joe survived the Delta Quadrant."  
  
"In _your_ reality," Q said, smiling as if at a private joke. "But in this one, well, so much for second chances!" He snapped his fingers, and once again they were caught up in the swirling white mist.  
  
_The meeting took place in a poorly lit corner of the rundown space station. At this hour, no one else was around, which meant they had total privacy for their transaction. The burly Rigellian removed a pouch from his belt and tossed it to the woman standing a few meters away.  
  
"There you are, Torres," he said, his tone almost a sneer. "For services rendered."  
  
Torres deftly caught the sack before it could hit the ground. Opening it, she glanced inside and then frowned. "This isn't what we agreed upon, Cyrus. Where's the rest of the latinum you promised me?"  
  
"That's all you deserve for the shoddy work you did on my engines. You're lucky I'm even willing to pay you this much." He paused. "I'd be well within my rights to give you nothing at all."  
  
"There's nothing wrong with my work," Torres said angrily. "I repaired that piece of crap you call a warp drive--it probably hasn't functioned this well anytime in the last decade."  
  
Cyrus shook his head. "My boys went over it--they say you did a sloppy job, and overcharged us for the new coil condenser."  
  
Torres glared at him. "If your 'boys' knew anything, Cyrus--or if you were more than a two-bit smuggler--you wouldn't have had to hire me to fix your engines."  
  
"Pretty big talk for a filthy little ex-con, Torres," Cyrus said scornfully. "If you ask me, the Feds should have let you rot in prison along with the other traitors. I heard some Starfleet bigshot put in a word for you--it must have cost quite a few bars of latinum to secure your early release. Of course, if there was **any** justice in the universe, the Jem'Hadar would have wiped you out with the rest of the Maquis scum."  
  
Torres cursed and lunged forward, but suddenly found her arms pinioned by two of Cyrus's 'boys' who had been lurking in the shadows. "You dishonorable bastard! bIjatlh 'e' yImev!"  
  
Cyrus grabbed her by the hair and lifted her face up toward his. With his other hand, he traced her forehead ridges. "You're not just Maquis scum, Torres, but a mongrel to boot. An outcast among the Humans, and the Klingons, too. Yes, I heard that even those incompetent bumblers who fancy themselves warriors wouldn't tolerate your presence on their homeworld."  
  
Torres spat in his face.  
  
Cyrus smashed his fist into her jaw. "You need to learn a little respect for your betters." He started to turn away.  
  
With a loud yell, Torres managed to wrench herself free from her captors. She pulled a blaster from the inside of her jacket, but Cyrus's men were quicker. Torres fell to the ground, a gaping hole where the left side of her torso had been.  
  
Cyrus bent down and retrieved his sack of latinum. Gesturing impatiently to his men, he said, "Come on, let's get out of here."  
  
_Q tsk-tsked. "Such a temper! Everyone always said it would get her into trouble one day."  
  
Kathryn fought down a wave of nausea. "To be cut down like that, in cold blood--"  
  
"Look on the bright side, Kathy," Q said comfortingly. "Dying in battle--even an ignominious street brawl like this--still wins a place in Sto-Vo-Kor! You should be happy for her."  
  
"But it's not right," Kathryn insisted. "B'Elanna had so much to live for--"  
  
"Now if you really want to see a case of wasted potential," Q interrupted, "take a look at this."  
  
_"Another round for everyone, Sandrine!" the jovial old man said, beaming. "We are drinking to my granddaughter's engagement!"  
  
_"Toutes nos félicitations, Pierre_," Sandrine said, with an answering smile. She waved away his credit chit. "Non, non, non, this one is on the house. Good times must be celebrated."  
  
"Especially as there are so few of them, since the end of the war," added Pierre's friend, lifting his empty glass in salute. A long scar wound its way down the left side of his face.  
  
"The Federation is still rebuilding, as is the rest of the sector," argued Pierre. "Once that is accomplished, things will improve."  
  
_"C'est très vrai,"_ Sandrine said, as she picked up the empty bottle. "Just a moment, Robert," she said to the scar-faced man. She went behind the bar to retrieve another bottle, and then proceeded to make her rounds among the tables, refilling glasses.  
  
"As hard as things have been, still it was worth every sacrifice," Robert said, resuming the conversation while savoring his new glass of wine. "We have lived through some momentous events. We are fortunate indeed to have seen the triumph of good over evil, in the Federation's defeat of the Dominion."  
  
"Rebuilding," scoffed the shabby-looking younger man who sat by himself in the corner. An empty bottle of whiskey and several glasses littered his tabletop. "The Dominion War's been over for three years already."  
  
"Your point?" asked Robert, eyeing him with distaste.  
  
Sandrine interrupted. "Pay no attention to this one. He is nothing more than a bitter drunkard." She lowered her voice and addressed the young man. "Tommy, _fermez la bouche!_ You make a fool of yourself."  
  
"I’m a fool?" Tommy said. He shook his head in bemusement. "I'm the only one here who can see clearly."  
  
"What do you see that we do not?" asked Robert, coming to stand in front of him.  
  
"The truth about the Federation and its precious Starfleet," Tommy said, staring at Robert.  
  
_"Ne dites pas un autre mot. Not another word," _Sandrine warned.  
  
"Let him speak," Robert said. "I would like to know what this young man, in his ignorance, has to say. So I can then tell him that I personally owe my life to the brave men and women of Starfleet." He indicated his scar. "You see this--it is a reminder of how I would have died when the Breen attacked our planet, if it weren't for Starfleet. They are all heroes, each and every one of them!"  
  
"And he who does not think this should be shot!" added Pierre angrily. "How dare you sit there casting aspersions on your betters!"  
  
Tommy's lip curled in derision. "Old man, I know more about Starfleet and the Federation than you ever will. This whole patriotism thing--what a load of misguided crap. Do you think the Federation actually cares about you? Worries about your well-being? Then you should just talk to anyone whose homeworld is in the DMZ. The Feds gave away those planets, and they're still under Cardassian rule today, years after the war. Kind of strange isn't it, considering the Cardassians were the **losers**\--hell, they were the aggressors!"  
  
"That does not change--" began Pierre, but Tommy interrupted.  
  
"You speak of hard times, but did you ever notice how the fat cats in San Francisco and Paris, the elite of the Federation, don't appear to be suffering any? Of course not." He laughed. "The Feds only look out for themselves, and everyone else can go to hell. They use people, and then drop them as soon as their usefulness is over."  
  
"That is not so!" insisted Robert. "You don't know what you're talking about!" There was a chorus of agreement among the other patrons in the bar.  
  
"I know from personal experience," Tommy said. He rose unsteadily and walked to the front of the room, facing down his crowd of accusers. "I was a member of Starfleet once, one of the 'best and the brightest.' One mistake--just one--and they drummed me out of the service. After sitting around for a bit feeling rejected, I found another cause to ally myself to. The Maquis--yes, the same poor bastards who had already been sacrificed by the Federation. Unfortunately, the Feds captured me and threw me in prison."  
  
"As they should have," Robert said. "You were a member of a terrorist organization!"  
  
Tommy didn't rise to the bait. "But then, after a while Starfleet realized that they still needed me. So they offered me a deal--help one of their ships in the Badlands, in exchange for commuting my sentence. I kept up my end of the bargain, but the Feds, well, let's just say they didn't keep theirs." He smiled bitterly. "My service on board Voyager wasn't good enough to win a pardon, or even an acknowledgment of thanks. That bitch of a captain--she could have cared less what happened to me afterwards, but you can be sure she was singing a different tune while we were still out in the Delta Quadrant."  
  
As Tommy spoke, Pierre put his hand on Robert's shoulder. "Come, _mon ami,_ do not sit here and listen to the ravings of this man."  
  
Robert didn't move for a long moment, but then allowed Pierre to pull him away. _"Je suis désolé_, Sandrine, but the atmosphere of your establishment is not as pleasant as it used to be." They picked up their coats and left, followed by a number of other people.  
  
Sandrine turned on Tommy furiously. _"Regardez ce que vous avez fait!_ Now look what you have done! You've driven away my customers!"  
  
Tommy slumped onto a stool. "Sorry." His tone belied his words.  
  
"And you think that is enough? To say that you are sorry?" Sandrine hissed. "For more than a year now, you have sat in the corner of my bar, drinking like a fish, wallowing in self-pity. I am sick of hearing about the callous disregard of your father, of your captain, of anyone else whose path has crossed yours! You have not any good words to say for anyone!"  
  
Tommy drew himself up straighter. "That's not so!"  
  
_"Quelle histoire,"_ Sandrine said contemptuously. "Have you ever cared about anyone other than yourself?"  
  
Some of Tommy's cynical air seemed evaporate. "I had a good friend once--Harry Kim. He didn't believe in judging people based on rumors or hearsay; he said he was capable of making up his own mind."  
  
Sandrine stared at him. "I have never heard you mention this Harry before. Where is he? What happened to him?"  
  
"He's dead--killed in action during the Dominion War." Tommy exhaled heavily. "Just a young idealistic kid who didn't realize how rotten life was, and died before he had to find out."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be." Tommy shrugged. "Harry was one of the lucky ones."  
  
Sandrine's sympathetic expression changed to one of disgust. "This attitude of yours--I have had enough. Tommy, I want you to leave my premises--permanently. I refuse you entry here. You have annoyed my customers, and you have annoyed me."  
  
Tommy laughed rudely. "Yeah, I guess you have no use for me anymore." He picked up her hand and caressed it. "It used to be different between us."  
  
Sandrine snatched her hand away. "I am serious, Tommy. _Vous quittez maintenant_, or I will have you thrown out!"  
  
Tommy made a big show of standing up and straightening his jacket. "Fine, I can take a hint."  
  
"And don't come back!" Sandrine said. She watched as he sauntered to the door, let it slam behind him. Before turning back to her work, she muttered, "_Quel dommage_."  
  
_"Goodness, but he was less than complimentary about you, Kathy!" Q said in mock amazement. "Such language--not at all what you'd expect from a young man from a good family. Though he didn't seem to be too happy with his family, either, come to think of it."  
  
Kathryn turned away. "Tom used to say that he didn't know what would have happened to him if he hadn't been given a second chance on _Voyager_." She grasped Q's hand. "Please, I don't want to see any more of this. I get the point, Q! Enough!"  
  
Q gave her a hand a lingering squeeze. "Ah, but there's one more member of the 'Kathryn Janeway fan club' I'd like you to meet."  
  
_The gray-haired man took his hand off the akoona and opened his eyes. He looked disappointed--or upset.  
  
"Is something wrong, Father?" asked the young girl who was sitting on the floor next to him.  
  
He forced a smile. "No, Shani, everything is fine." He gathered up the items from his medicine bundle and rose. "Why don't you ask your mother if she needs any help preparing our evening meal."  
  
"All right," she said, heading toward the kitchen. His smile faded as soon as she was out of sight.  
  
Shani was back in less than a minute. "Mother said she doesn't need me--can I go down to the river? Mother said it's all right with her as long as you don't mind."  
  
"Go ahead," he said. "But make sure you're back before dark." He watched her skip happily out the door, then sighed heavily.  
  
"Chakotay?" A Bajoran woman stood in the doorway. "What's the matter?"  
  
He didn't meet her eyes. "Nothing, Lara."  
  
Lara came over and put her arms around him. "You can't fool me that easily, my dear."  
  
Chakotay inhaled sharply. "I suppose you know me too well."  
  
"After so many years of marriage, I should hope so!" Lara said teasingly, then sobered. "Tell me what's troubling you."  
  
Chakotay moved out of her comforting embrace and went to the window. "Look out there--what do you see?"  
  
"What do you mean? I see the other homes in the village."  
  
"Look toward the other side of the river. Do you see trees, grass, healthy crops?"  
  
"Chakotay--"  
  
"Dorvan is almost a complete wasteland," he said, pain evident in his voice. "With all our hard work, we've only been able to restore a pitifully small area--nearly 20 years after the Cardassians first blasted the planet with their thermalite weapons. Everything from the plants to the animals to the microbes in the soil was wiped out. In addition to the people. Do you know how many thousands died?"  
  
"You're not telling me anything new," Lara said quietly. "I grew up during the Occupation. I know what those monsters were capable of. At least they eventually got a taste of their own medicine--Cardassia Prime was practically leveled by the end of the Dominion War."  
  
Chakotay swung around, his fists clenched, his face contorted by a wave of anger. "And yet the Federation allocated scarce resources to help Cardassia rebuild, while we were given nothing! Nothing! Everything we've achieved--pitiful as it is--has been solely through our own efforts, our blood and sweat and tears! Cardassia's victims still suffer, but those responsible for it receive free food, medicine--"  
  
Lara raised her voice to be heard over his tirade. "Chakotay, calm down. There's no use letting yourself get so upset--"  
  
At her words, his arms dropped to his sides. "I'm sorry," he said. "I shouldn't be taking this out on you."  
  
Lara looked deeply into his eyes. "What caused this sudden outburst, Chakotay? After all, the situation isn't new. It's been like this for over a decade--as long as we've been living here."  
  
He didn't answer for a long moment. "I was meditating earlier. My spirit guide took me back into the past, showed me a vision of Dorvan of long ago. The way I remember it when I was a small boy. The fields were green, the sky was blue. There were birds singing, and insects buzzing. It was all so beautiful, so peaceful; my friends and I were laughing, playing some game. I could see their faces...it was all so real."  
  
He paused. "And when the vision ended, I realized that it would never be that way again."  
  
Lara blinked away her own tears. "Chakotay, I'm so sorry." It was her turn to hesitate. "But it's not exactly true, that Dorvan will never be restored."  
  
He pulled her into his arms, cradling her against his chest. "Oh, Lara, I know. Over the course of a few hundred years, the planet will eventually recover. This small part we've reclaimed is the seed from which it will all spring." He sighed. "But it won't be in my lifetime."  
  
She was silent, listening to his heartbeat. "It could be," she said finally.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
Lara lifted her head. "If we had access to the large-scale terraforming machinery, we could accomplish in months what would normally take years."  
  
Chakotay laughed. "If! Why not wish for a magic talisman out of the ancient legends while you're at it?"  
  
She refused to treat it as a joke. "As you said, the talismans are the stuff of legend, but the terraformers are real."  
  
"They may as well be legends, for all that we could hope to get one," Chakotay said.  
  
"The Federation has them," Lara pointed out.  
  
"And you think they'd just give them to us?" Chakotay said incredulously. "Haven't you been listening to me? The Federation has given us **nothing** since the first colonists came back. What makes you think they'd be willing to help us now?"  
  
"You could ask them, Chakotay."  
  
"Why would they be willing to listen to me?" he said dismissively. "I have no friends among the Federation."  
  
"Remember that Starfleet captain, Janeway?"  
  
His mouth tightened. "What about her?"  
  
"She's an admiral now, was promoted shortly after the war ended. I heard her name mentioned in a recent news report. The reporter said she's one of the most influential voices in Starfleet today, even in the Federation itself. I'm sure she'd be able to help us."  
  
"But why would she be willing?" Chakotay asked.  
  
"Because she owes you a favor. You've told me more than once how you saved her ship, out in the Delta Quadrant. If it weren't for you, everyone on Voyager would have been killed."  
  
"You're forgetting something, Lara," he said bitterly. "Right after I saved her ship--at the cost of my own--she promptly threw me and the rest of the Maquis in the brig and then glibly handed us over to the Federation authorities as soon as Voyager returned home. That's how Janeway showed her gratitude."  
  
"Chakotay--"  
  
"No, Lara. I know you mean well, but we won't discuss this any further." He strode toward the door of their cabin. "I'm going out. I'll be back before dinner."  
  
  
  
_


	5. Act 4

_  
_**Act Four  
  
**"What about Tuvok?" Kathryn asked, though she dreaded to hear the answer.  
  
"What about him?"  
  
"Is he dead, too, in this reality?"   
  
"Your crew does seem to be having singularly bad luck, don't they?" Q agreed, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Rest assured, however, that your Vulcan sidekick is still alive...if you can call it living."  
  
Kathryn looked at Q aghast. "What's happened to Tuvok? Is he ill?"  
  
"No, no, nothing like that," Q reassured her. "What I meant is that he went into politics after his resignation from Starfleet. He became quite a prominent figure in the Vulcan planetary council."  
  
Kathryn breathed a sigh of relief, not just for Tuvok's sake but for her own. Perhaps this little journey Q had insisted on taking was over and she could go back to--  
  
"Shall we check on some of your other little friends and see what they've been up to lately?" Q asked rhetorically.  
  
_The corridor was filled with barely recognizable Borg machinery. There was an odd, low-pitched humming sound in the background. A pile of corpses off to the right told the story.  
  
The Royal Complex was dying.  
  
A short distance away, in the central chamber, two members of species 8472 stood next to another pile of corpses. Nearby, four surviving drones stood in a semicircle around the prone figure of their Queen.   
  
Responding to a sudden signal, two of the drones swung around and moved in the direction of the tripedal aliens. But their gait lacked the smooth precision that was the hallmark of the Collective. The drones stumbled; the shots they fired were wild and failed to hit their targets. Instead, they exploded against the walls, further damaging the battered junctions.  
  
After advancing less than a meter, the two drones collapsed, their corpses shriveling as they fell. Neither one of the aliens had moved. A third drone fell. The last drone, who might have once been a Human female, lunged at the two 8472 with her assimilation tubules but_ _fell short of her target. Her intended victim fired a single shot, vaporizing her completely._  
  
_With a loud hiss, the Queen tried to stand. She managed to get to her knees before collapsing. The two 8472 took a final survey of the dead drones and moved away. The lights flickered and then the room was plunged into total darkness.  
  
_"And thus falls the once mighty Borg," Q said. "They should have remembered the old schoolyard lesson of bullies--someone bigger and badder eventually comes along."  
  
"I don't think I want to meet anyone worse than 8472." Kathryn turned to face him, a sudden thought bursting full-grown into her mind. "Are they a threat to the Q Continuum, as well? Is that why you're so concerned about them?"  
  
"Bah. Of course not," Q scoffed. "Does the word 'omnipotent' mean anything to you?" He rolled his eyes. "But with 8472 in total control, imagine how boring our lives would become. You lower lifeforms are so entertaining."  
  
"It's nice to know we're good for something," she replied, letting her voice drip with sarcasm. "Are we done yet?"  
  
"Almost," Q said with a smirk. He held up two rectangular pieces of paper. "Next stop Alpha Quadrant. All passengers are required to have tickets their tickets stamped and ready."  
  
_"Admiral Janeway," the woman behind the transporter console said as the decorated veteran of many battles stepped off the transporter pad. "Welcome aboard the Strident. I'm Captain Jenny Delaney."  
  
"Thank you, Captain," Janeway said briskly. "Have you heard from Starfleet Command?"  
  
"They've approved the mission. The Strident and the Forester will be ready for departure in the hour."  
  
"Very good." The Admiral glanced curiously at the officer standing before her. "Delaney? The name seems familiar."  
  
Delaney smiled briefly. "Yes, ma'am. My sister and I served under you on Voyager almost twenty years ago."   
  
Janeway nodded. "That's right. What was her name? Margaret?"  
  
"Megan." Delaney frowned. "She died in the first wave of attacks by these aliens. As so many others did."  
  
"I'm sorry for your loss, Captain."  
  
"Thank you, ma'am." Delaney cleared her throat. "Off the record, Admiral, what are our chances? Is there any hope at all that we can defeat this enemy?"  
  
Janeway took a deep breath. "Vulcan fell last week, and we haven't heard from Qo'noS for almost three days." She shook her head. "These aliens make the Borg and the Dominion look like minor threats. Their bioships have managed to do what no other force has ever accomplished, namely penetrate the Federation's innermost lines of defense, leaving nothing but destruction in their wake. Their shields are nearly impervious to our weapons. I won't mince words, Captain--the situation is very grave. We've sent distress signals to our allies, but_ _we don't expect a response. The entire Alpha and Beta Quadrants have been overrun."  
  
Delaney's eyes met the Admiral's unwaveringly. "What is our plan, ma'am?"  
  
"These aliens create singularities, allowing them to cross from fluidic space into our own, at any point they choose. Our mission is to access these **tunnels** and attempt to destroy them from the inside. If we're successful, we'll trap them permanently within fluidic space." The Admiral added, "And ourselves, as well."  
  
Delaney nodded. "Understood, Admiral."  
  
"I have the coordinates for our rendezvous with the Enterprise. Captain Barclay is expecting us by 0800 hours tomorrow morning."   
  
_Kathryn turned to her guide in consternation. "Q--the Federation is on the brink of destruction? How did this happen?"  
  
Q nodded. "It was quite a tragedy, but it's all your doing, you know. I had been so fond of Captain Picard, too. I'll miss his enthusiastic defenses of lower lifeforms such as yourselves. But that's life. And death." He started to snap his fingers, but stopped. "To think that within the next few weeks the glorious history of human exploration will have gone to the dogs." He grinned suddenly. "Yet another quaint expression. Someday, I'll have to tell you about the time I spent pretending to be a dog."  
  
Kathryn shook her head in disgust. "You’re impossible. We're talking about the end of my people--of all sentient life in the galaxy--and all you can do is talk about your life as a dog?"  
  
Q laughed. "Not just any dog, but one privileged to travel on one of the earliest starships and who certainly left his mark. That time on the Kreetassans' planet--But that's another story. Maybe when you're in a better mood?" He made a sweeping motion with his right hand. "Very well. Operation Bitter Seed is about to commence."  
  
"Bitter Seed?"  
  
"While we were conversing, the _Forester_ and _Strident_ have rendezvoused with the _Enterprise_ and certain modifications have been made. Perhaps we should go to the bridge?" He snapped his fingers.  
  
_"Admiral Janeway, we've located a singularity," the young ensign said from the tactical station. "One thousand kilometers off our port bow."  
  
"Notify the other ships." Janeway stood. "Tell them to get ready to follow us in."  
  
Captain Delaney exchanged glances with the Admiral. "Helm, bring us in closer, to a distance of one hundred kilometers. Shields at maximum. Commander Torm, any sign of the enemy?"  
  
"No, Captain. But they've been here recently. The tactical probe we launched earlier reports that Sector 51 has been obliterated."  
  
Janeway turned to address the bridge crew. "I don't have to remind anyone that this mission is vital to the survival of all sentient life."   
  
"Engineering is standing by," Delaney said quietly.  
  
"Captain." The helm officer looked concerned. "Admiral. We're in position now."  
  
Janeway nodded. "Go ahead, Captain." Delaney quickly entered a command into her console.   
  
The center of the viewscreen displayed a tight swirling pattern, which rapidly enlarged. The ensign at the helm gulped visibly as the ship entered the singularity._  
  
Kathryn blinked her eyes several times when she found herself sitting at a table in an empty white room. There was no other furniture. Glancing from side to side, she realized she couldn't see any walls.  
  
"And so it ends," Q said softly as he sat down beside her.  
  
"They were defeated? What exactly was Operation Bitter Seed?"  
  
"A biological weapon somewhat similar to the nanovirus you developed and deployed in the Borg Civil War in your reality. But without your Doctor's brilliance--all the Mark I Emergency Medical Holograms were consigned to mining duties, you know--and without Icheb's contributions, it wasn't quite as effective. Too little, too late." He hesitated. "I figured you would prefer not to stay for the _bitter_ end. Of course, if you insist--"  
  
"No, that's all right." She closed her eyes. "In my reality, this never happens, right?"  
  
He waggled a playful finger at her. "Never say never...but you are correct, Kathy darling. Because you chose to destroy the Array, none of the things I've shown you will come to pass."  
  
Kathryn closed her eyes, weak with relief. She was very glad she was sitting down. Several minutes of silence passed before she trusted herself to speak. "The Federation will survive?"  
  
"Talk about a one track mind--yes, it survives. But it will be tested many times." He laughed. "Now that's a good one. Time." She looked at him, wondering just what he'd thought of now. "Sorry, that's a joke I can't explain to you in this _time_ and place."   
  
"Q," she said sadly, thinking of all the loss and devastation she had witnessed--that he had shown her. "I can't stand around and do nothing. I'm a Starfleet Captain, it's not in my nature--"  
  
"Or your job description," he said glibly.  
  
"Isn't there anything I can do to save this universe? Prevent all those deaths?"  
  
He shook his head in exasperation. "Haven't you learned by now that you can't control all events? And that's in your own reality, let alone here." He stood up and took her hand. "Which reminds me--are you ready to go home?"  
  
"Yes. No, wait--" No sooner were the words out of her mouth than Kathryn found herself enveloped in the swirling mist once more.  
  



	6. Act 5

  
****Act Five  
  
She was on _Voyager_.   
  
That was the first thing Kathryn noticed. There was no mistaking the faint hum of the warp engines in the background, even a certain indefinable scent in the air. But there was something different...  
  
As she looked around, she recognized she was in the holoprogram of Sandrine's. Having witnessed the scene with the 'other' Tom Paris in the actual bar, she was aware of subtle differences. But was she actually here or just 'observing' like she had earlier?  
  
She noticed a vaguely familiar-looking young woman in the science blue uniform at the pool table, poised to make a shot. Kathryn picked up a cue and strolled over.  
  
"Captain," the woman stammered, "Is my time up?"  
  
"No. You're fine," Kathryn said, raising a reassuring hand. "I was hoping to get in some practice. Ensign Lily Ford, isn't it? Xenobiology?"  
  
The younger woman smiled. "That's right. Xenovirology actually, even if the paperwork says biology."  
  
"Ah." Kathryn looked at the table. "Are you planning to play in next week's tournament?"  
  
Lily smiled. "Yes, ma'am. I was pool champion of my graduating class. I haven't had much opportunity to play recently, though."  
  
Janeway tapped her commbadge. "Janeway to Commander Chakotay."  
  
"Chakotay here. Yes, Captain?"  
  
"I'm having a meeting with the Xenovirology staff, so I'll be a little late for my shift. You have the bridge, Commander. Janeway out." She looked at Ensign Ford. "Rack them up."  
  
Lily hesitated. "Ma'am, I'm on duty in fifteen minutes."  
  
Janeway laughed. "Ensign, you're having a meeting with the captain. I don't think you'll get in trouble."  
  
Lily smiled in return. "Interesting definition of meeting." She quickly finished racking the balls. "I believe you go first."  
  
"No," Janeway said confidently. "I'll clean up."  
  
Ten minutes later, Janeway had to concede that not going first was a mistake. Ensign Lily Ford was an excellent player.  
  
*  
  
"So," Chakotay whispered, as she took her seat on the bridge. "Another successful meeting?"  
  
"That depends on how you define success," Janeway said as she leaned a little closer to him. "Ensign Ford is a talented officer--or a very lucky one."  
  
Chakotay chuckled. "I suppose I shouldn't mention that Lieutenant Paris has hired her as his pool teacher. He's bound and determined to beat you in next week's tournament."  
  
"If he thinks his pride is hurting now, just wait." Janeway grinned. "I hope you don't mind covering the beginning of the shift for me these last few days."  
  
Chakotay nodded. "Well, those meetings with the Xenovirology staff are very important, aren't they?" he asked innocently.  
  
Janeway nodded, keeping a perfectly straight face. "Ever since that incident which caused the gelpacks to become infected, I've felt we needed to 'beef up' our biology departments."  
  
"Right, blame it on the cheese," Chakotay muttered under his breath.  
  
"What else--" Janeway began.  
  
"Captain," Harry Kim said, interrupting the conversation. She could hear the urgency in his voice. "I'm detecting two Kazon vessels on an intercept course."  
  
"Red alert," Janeway said. She glanced at Chakotay. "Lieutenant Paris, go to warp eight. I'd rather not fight them today."  
  
That hope was dashed as the two Kazon ships set off in pursuit. "Captain," Harry said, "There's a third ship straight ahead."  
  
"Maje Cullah has wised up," Chakotay said. "Definitely a change in tactics over the past week or two. He's decided there's strength in numbers--and hopes to surround us."  
  
"So it would seem," Janeway said, "But I don't intend to get caught in his trap." She stood. "Lieutenant Paris, set a new course, heading zero-forty-five. Lieutenant Tuvok, I want a complete sensor sweep of the sector."  
  
"Long-range sensors indicate three more ships are approaching, Captain," Tuvok said as the nearest ship fired.  
  
"Return fire," Janeway said. "Concentrate on Maje Cullah's ship."  
  
"Hoping he'll take the hint?" Chakotay asked.  
  
"I think he's too dense to even know what a hint is." She looked at the screen. "Prepare to fire aft photon torpedoes, spread pattern gamma chi. The sooner we get out of this 'box' the better."   
  
The other Kazon ships fired. _Voyager_ shook; the lights blinked and emergency power came on.   
  
"What's the status of our shields?" Chakotay asked sharply.  
  
"Down to 72 percent," Tuvok answered.  
  
Janeway gritted her teeth. "Keep firing." She watched as a small Kazon ship exploded. The others continued their attack.  
  
"Minor damage to Cullah's ship," Harry said. "Captain, they're concentrating their fire on our port side."  
  
"Ensign Kim is correct," Tuvok said. "Shields are down on the port side to 65 percent. I am attempting to reroute power."   
  
She nodded as _Voyager _fired again, and then glanced at the tactical display in front of her.   
  
"Captain, I am unable to reroute power," Tuvok reported a few seconds later. "Shields are failing in that area. If we sustain any more hits, a hull breach is imminent."  
  
"Evacuate the area," Janeway ordered as the ship lurched suddenly. She landed heavily on her left side, but managed to break her fall with her hand. She pushed herself up with her other arm, wincing as she flexed her left hand.  
  
"Captain, are you all right?" Chakotay asked as he helped her up.  
  
"Fine," she said through clenched teeth. "Lieutenant Paris, at the first sign of an opening, get us out of here."  
  
"Yes, ma'am," Paris said. "Almost there....now!" The ship shook as Paris' hands flew over his console, but within moments, space ahead of them was clear.  
  
"There are still three Kazon ships in pursuit, Captain," Tuvok said.  
  
"Fire at the lead vessel," Janeway said. "They obviously need a little discouragement."  
  
"The Kazon have broken off their attack," Tuvok reported a few minutes later. "We are no longer being pursued."  
  
"Damage report," Janeway said. A wisp of hair had come loose from her bun and she absently tucked it behind her ear.  
  
"Captain, there was an explosion on Deck five, section two, the science labs," Harry said. "The fire suppression system is off-line."  
  
"Get a damage control team over there right away," Janeway said. "Anyone injured?"  
  
"Three casualties reported. No word as to the severity of the injuries yet," Harry answered.  
  
She glanced at the main viewscreen, and then stood, cradling her injured hand. "Maintain yellow alert, Commander. I'll be in Sickbay."  
  
*  
  
The Doctor quickly ran his mediwand over her, then made a tsk-tsk sound. "And it only hurts when you laugh?"  
  
"Actually it hurts when I don't laugh, too," Kathryn replied, telling herself that at least the EMH appeared to be trying to rectify his poor bedside manner. "How are the others?"  
  
"Ensign Seska suffered second degree burns on her hands and arms; Kes is with her now." Janeway opened her mouth, surprised; Seska was assigned to Engineering--how did she happen to be in the science lab? Before she could ask, however, the Doctor resumed speaking. "Ensign Wildman was very lucky--she just has some bruises. Her fetus is fine as well." He picked up the internal tissue regenerator. "And as for you, Captain, just minor damage--in addition to spraining your wrist, you also broke your middle finger."  
  
Kathryn looked around, noting that aside from herself, Seska and Wildman, there were no other patients present. A terrible certainty grew inside her, but she had to ask anyway. "The report said there were three casualties from the science lab explosion--"  
  
The Doctor looked away for a moment. In a corner of her mind, she was amazed at just how much emotion the hologram could display, but the major part of her was focused on the news that was sure to come. "Who was it?" she asked quietly.  
  
"Ensign Lily Ford," the Doctor said. "She'd gone into full cardiac arrest at the scene; she was dead before we could transport her to Sickbay. I'm sorry, Captain, there was nothing I could do."  
  
Kathryn went over to the biobed where Samantha Wildman was struggling to sit up. "What happened, Ensign?" she asked gently.  
  
"We were trapped in the lab by the explosion. If Seska hadn't arrived when she did..." Samantha shook her head. "She was able to pry the doors open...Lily told me to get out, but then there was a second explosion. Lily saved me, Captain, but at the cost of her own life..."  
  
Kes placed a comforting hand on Samantha's back as the woman started to cry.  
  
The Doctor nodded. "It was the second explosion which started the fire. Seska was injured attempting to pull Ensign Ford from the flames." He placed the regenerator back on the table. "Give the hand a few hours before you try to use it."  
  
Janeway nodded numbly. "I'll make a note in my official log recommending citations for both Ensigns Seska and Ford," she whispered.  
  
*  
  
Q laughed. "Too bad Seska didn't stick around to receive that citation."  
  
Kathryn shook her head. "Two weeks later her true identity as a Cardassian spy was revealed and she fled with the Kazon.” She paused. “Q, what I just experienced--that isn't what happened."  
  
He rolled his eyes. "Kathy, Kathy, Kathy." He tapped the side of his head. "Sometimes I wonder why I even bother." He let out a long exaggerated sigh. "You complained about not making a difference; you can't change events in the other universe, but you could make _one_ inconsequential difference here. See to it that you make the most of it." He snapped his fingers.  
  



	7. Epilogue

  
****Epilogue:  
  
"Excellent presentation," Aaron Bridgewater, the science reporter for the Federation News Service, said as he shook Kathryn's hand. "Best keynote speech at any one of these shindigs in the past five years. And believe me, I've heard a lot of them."  
  
"That's good to know," Kathryn said. She shook her head at the sense of deja vu she was feeling. She flexed her left hand, momentarily surprised it didn't hurt, then wondered why she should expect it to.  
  
She took a sip of her drink and tried not to sigh too loudly. She was pleased that her presentation on "Astronomical Phenomena of the Delta Quadrant" had been well received, but she really wished that Chakotay could have attended the Federation Geographical and Astronomical Society's gala evening with her.  
  
"Congratulations," said a tall Andorian male striding up to her. Kathryn tried and failed to place who he was. "Amazing speech, Captain! Especially when you described seeing the multiple supernovae--I almost felt like I was there myself!"  
  
"Thank you," Kathryn said politely. She caught her sister's eye, hoping Phoebe would be willing to leave soon. The 'social' part of these type of gatherings was a necessary evil as far as Kathryn was concerned, but Phoebe looked as though she were enjoying herself.  
  
"Hey," Phoebe called out. "Over here." She grasped Kathryn's arm and gently but firmly pulled her away from her group of admirers and led her over to an alcove. "Wait till you see this!"  
  
Kathryn smiled at the childhood memories this simple act brought; Phoebe had always been one for sharing her enthusiasms. Suddenly, Kathryn frowned. There was something about memories...  
  
"Kath, this painting--" Phoebe broke off suddenly at the bewildered expression on her sister's face. "What's wrong?"  
  
"I don't know. It feels like there's something I need to do, or should have done..." Kathryn closed her eyes.  
  
Phoebe laughed. "Did you forget to turn off your replicator? Are you burning the peanut butter sandwiches? Or maybe liquefying another roast?"  
  
"No, that's not it." Kathryn opened her eyes. "Doctor Michelle Ford. Is she here?"  
  
"I have no idea." Phoebe stared at her. "Who is she anyway?"  
  
"A member of the Hawking Astronomical Consortium. Her sister was a member of the _Voyager _crew." Janeway looked around, straining to see over the heads of the crowd.  
  
Phoebe exhaled in exasperation. "Well, while you look for your scientist, I see some people that I'd like to talk to." She gestured at the painting on the wall. "Not that I think you're interested, but this is by Geoffrey Wallace. He's here tonight, and I've been hoping--"  
  
Kathryn shook her head. "Sorry. Go, try to find your artist. I'll wait for you."  
  
Phoebe grinned. "You're a good sister." She dashed off. Kathryn smiled at her enthusiasm.  
  
"Captain Janeway, I wanted to say how much I enjoyed your presentation." Kathryn turned around and inwardly groaned, while plastering what she hoped was a convincing smile on her face.  
  
"Thank you, Mrs. Vanderhosen. It was an honor to be invited to be the keynote speaker this evening." She lowered her voice. "I'm looking for Dr. Michelle Ford. You wouldn't happen to know where I could find her, would you?"  
  
"One of our up and coming 'stars', and such a dear sweet thing besides," Mrs. Vanderhosen giggled. "Come along, I'll introduce you."  
  
Mrs. Vanderhosen clamped her hand on Kathryn's elbow, and steered her toward a tight cluster of people. The crowd parted with alacrity, with several people moving as fast as possible out of that worthy matron's way. Mrs. Vanderhosen didn't seem to notice, or perhaps she accepted it as a matter of course. "Ah, there she is!"  
  
A petite blonde woman was standing next to a much taller man. Though she had never met her before, Kathryn somehow knew instantly that this was Michelle Ford.  
  
"Michelle, darling, Captain Kathryn Janeway requested an introduction," Mrs. Vanderhosen said beaming. "I do believe she's one of your fans!"  
  
"Dr. Ford," Kathryn said, holding out her hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you."  
  
The younger woman looked stunned as she took Kathryn's hand. "The pleasure is all mine, Captain Janeway. Talk about fans, I've been an admirer of yours for a long time." She smiled shyly. "My sister Lily served on board your ship. When _Voyager_ returned home last year, we were sent a box containing her personal effects. She mentioned you a few times in her private logs. Something about pool, I believe?"  
  
Kathryn laughed. "Your sister was a hell of a pool player, in addition to being a fine officer. And a hero." She hesitated. "I'd like to talk to you about her, if I may."  
  
Michelle Ford nodded. "That would be wonderful. There's so much I've always wanted to know about what her life on _Voyager_ was like."

  
**FINIS**  


**Author's Note:**

> **Up next: “The Risian Ribald (A.K.A. Purple Prose of Cell Block 74)” by the Voyager Virtual Season 7.5 Staff.** The title says it all: purple prose, courtesy of the Risian Ribald, as enjoyed by a pair of Ferengi brothers we've met before who are currently living on Cell Block 74.


End file.
